A year ago I had a dream of living in my own space, where I could venture a deeper intimacy with God, live in submission to his will, and enjoy the still and constant companionship of the Holy Spirit.
I write this piece in the half-empty apartment which has been my modest home for a month already. I write to declare that God is faithful.
I am humbled to think back at how God moved the pieces throughout 2021 and took charge of my situation to do exactly what he said he would do. The people he put in my life which have become key features of this season – leaders, helpers, counsel.
For the first time in my life, perhaps because it’s the first time I’ve paid attention, I can feel God loving me through the people in my life. I can hear his voice and feel his hand in the peculiar encounters on my way to work, at the office, while running errands. What a glorious grace.
Thank God for the grace to recognise his presence in my life. Otherwise, I would conclude (in my flesh) that I am simply not doing enough to be sensitive to his move. In my unwitting hubris and attachment to outcomes I would deduce that I needed to pray more, fast more, etc. That somehow God’s move was up to my behaviour.
I give thanks for reminders that humble me, gentle reminders that the course of my life is decidedly out of my control. God is God in spite of my conduct.
I am, however, currently undergoing a ‘spiritual reset’ – an endeavour to fortify spiritual disciplines such as prayer, fasting, and studying. I am reverting to the tone of my spiritual life this time a year ago. I am returning to strict adherence to spiritual disciplines in my routine.
I am yearning for a closeness, a clarity, and a peace which I can only find in Jehovah. I am looking to abide, intentionally. For no other reason than that he has been who he has been. He has been consistently reliable. And I only have to open my eyes each morning to see it.
I am, quite literally, living in the abundance of his faithfulness. Glory be to the Sovereign God.
– Lele M
Lele Muthali 